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The Onion is an American digital media & news satire organization that publishes articles on international, national, and local news.
Recent Articles from The Onion

Report: Many States Still Relying On Outdated Methods To Disenfranchise Voters

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONUrging Congress to take action before the entire system was compromised, the Federal Election Commission warned Thursday that many states were still relying...

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Panicked Falcons Discover Scratch In Mercedes Benz Stadium

THEONION.COM – ATLANTA, GAPacing and cursing as they searched in vain for a note, the entire Falcons roster reportedly panicked Friday after finding a massive...

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Trump Administration Urges Saudis To Stick To Killing Random Yemeni Civilians

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONAs criticism mounted over the countrys alleged role in the disappearance and possible death of journalist Jamal Khashoggi, the Trump administration reportedly urged...

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Should LeBron James Leave Space Jam 2 For A Movie With A Better Chance Of Winning An Oscar?

THEONION.COM – The Onion Americas Finest News Source Should LeBron James Leave Space Jam 2 For A Movie With A Better Chance Of Winning An...

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Is This Year’s Giants Team An Al-Qaeda Plot Designed To Hurt New Yorkers Again?

THEONION.COM – The Onion Americas Finest News Source Is This Year’s Giants Team An Al-Qaeda Plot Designed To Hurt New Yorkers Again?

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Frightened Don Jr. Asks If He Can Sleep In Dads Bed After Bad Dream About Being Indicted

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONSobbing uncontrollably as he ran into the room, Donald Trump Jr. asked his father, the 45th president of the United States, if he...

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Nikki Haley Resigns To Accept Consulting Role With Afghan Warlord

THEONION.COM – NEW YORKSaying she hoped the new position would allow her to grow both personally and professionally, Nikki Haley announced Tuesday she would resign...

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New Polls Increase Fears That Midterm Elections Will Be Won By Wave Of Politicians

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONCausing dread and consternation among significant swaths of registered voters, a series of Reuters-Ipsos polls released Tuesday increased fears that the 2018 midterm...

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Lindsey Graham Dining Alone At Applebees Kind Of Wishes Protesters Would Come Heckle Him

THEONION.COM – ALEXANDRIA, VAAdmitting that it would be a nice change of pace to have some attention every now and then, Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC)...

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Sean McDermott Wonders If He Still Needs To Act Angry Even If Everyone Already Knows Bills Going To

THEONION.COM – BUFFALO, NYWatching his team fail miserably while attempting to convert yet another third down and long, Buffalo Bills head coach Sean McDermott wondered...

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Lisa Murkowski Admits She Thought Being Alaskan Senator Would Just Mean Having To Deal With Bears An

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONSomewhat taken aback by her pivotal role in Brett Kavanaughs potential confirmation to the Supreme Court, Lisa Murkowski (R-AK) confessed to reporters Friday...

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Calm, Measured Trump Hard At Work After Freak Accident Leaves Him With Railroad Spike Lodged In Skul

THEONION.COM – WASHINGTONLogging countless hours in the Oval Office between warmly greeting foreign diplomats, an unusually serene and well-spoken President Trump was hard at work...

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